"Men do change, and change comes like a little wind that ruffles the curtains at dawn, and it comes like the stealthy perfume of wildflowers hidden in the grass." ~ John Steinbeck
Happiness is a decision we make every day, every moment. What one thing can you do right now to be happier? Here is just one:
Change your mind.
By changing the way you perceive things, you can be happier. The person in front of you in line is talking loudly on her cell phone. The clerk has a dour expression and doesn't respond to your smile. Your mind is still at work, where your co-worker continues to do that annoying thing you hate, and your boss has found yet another project for you to do...So what? None of this need affect your happiness unless you let it. It is your choice. Is it a surprise that other people act and react differently than you do? Is it a surprise that someone hasn't changed? You haven't. Allow them to be where they are at, and forgive yourself for where you are at as well. It's all okay.
I'm starting my Happiness Project, and invite you to as well.
"Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42
I'm sitting here, on Gwen's porch, rocking and reading. Suddenly, my thoughts stop with the realization, "I am right where I want to be." And while this gives me pause, it's not entirely shocking. Ask me how I'm doing, these days, and I'll generally tell you, with honesty, "I'm happy!"
Looking back, if years ago I had been asked, "What would an ideal day look like for you?", I have a feeling it would have gone something along these lines:
Go to work to a job I love
at an organization that makes a difference in the community.
At lunchtime, on this beautiful day,
dine with a wonderful friend
at a new (to me) delightful eatery downtown
in this city that I adore. After work,
head to the CSA (which I help organize) pickup and
separate the shares of fresh, locally grown, organic veggies with
our farmer (Tommy, who works hard, complains little, and has very kind eyes).
This week: sweet and hot peppers, apples, and squash (spaghetti, butternut, and delicata)!
Then, relax,
rock on the porch, and
read a good book.
Talk to friends as they come by,
hold a baby,
give hugs,
drive home leisurely
with the windows down
through a park,
and eat chocoloate ice cream for dinner.
And this is exactly what my day has been. Yes, the mosquitoes are making a grand feast of me as I sit on the porch. Yes, there are situations I'm dealing with that are not as pleasant as ice cream for dinner. But I'm still happy. I know those things will get wrapped up in time. And my home isn't perfectly arranged. I'm still unpacking and sorting through boxes. But I'm very glad to be here. I'm very glad for my roommate, especially as we mutually provide emotional and spiritual support for each other, beyond even the financial benefit of sharing a house.
More everyday, I am living one of the simple rules of happiness: Find something right now to be happy about. In other words, be happy in the now. Be in the now.
Today at work, one of our managers came in. I said to her, "It's really good to see you. You're one of those people who always have a smile no matter what's going on." "There's no use not to," she replied. And she's right.
"It's just a ride." So said young comedian Bill Hicks. Sound familiar? (Did I hear don Miguel in the back of the room?) Bill reminds us:
"The world is like a ride in an amusement park. And when you choose to go on it, it feels real, because that's how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down, and round and round, and it has thrills and chills, and it's very brightly colored, and it's very loud. And it's fun--for a while. Some people have been on the ride for a long time, and they begin to question: 'Is this real, or is this just a ride?' And other people, have remembered, and they come back to us, and they say, 'Hey--don't worry, don't be afraid, ever, because it's just a ride!' And we kill those people...It's just a ride, and we can change it anytime we want. It's only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings and money; a choice, right now, between fear and love."
We are each living the dream of our life. Our dream is made up of our beliefs, our interpretations, our agreements, and those that we have learned from others. We can look at the drama from many perspectives. I can second-guess my decisions, I can worry about whether I'm doing everything right. I can do that very well; I've done it for much of my life. But I'm getting more of a glimpse of the "ride" from the car where my fellow passengers are screaming with glee with their hands up in the air, instead of the one where everyone is white-knuckled and puking in mid-air.
Today a situation arose that normally would cause me more anxiety. Instead, I was able to laugh about it. It's part of a larger situation--one where I know I'm doing what's right, but it's unknown territory and could be scary. But, if I screw up a little bit on the execution of it...I'll say "Oops!" and remember that "It's only a ride." And I used to hate roller coasters.
In the midst of life, we find ourselves. Every choice we make takes us closer or further from our highest good. So, hopefully we approach each decision with the proper reverence. Even the hardest decisions, that seem to tear us apart, can bring joy and happiness in the end; sometimes even sooner than expected.
The time for me to write again has come. The time has come to create. To weave into existence transmutations of the beauty I see and experience. Beauty in love and in pain. Beauty in adversity and in success. Beauty in the everday and the ordinary. Beauty is all around me. Beauty is unavoidable.
To the Universe: Thank you for the omnipresent Grace you have showered upon me during the past few years, and that you continue to rain upon me; kisses from Heaven.
grace /greɪs/ noun, verb, graced, grac·ing. –noun 1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action. 2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment. 3. favor or good will. 4. a manifestation of favor, esp. by a superior. 5. mercy; clemency; pardon: an act of grace. 6. favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity. 7. an allowance of time after a debt or bill has become payable granted to the debtor before suit can be brought against him or her or a penalty applied. 8. Theology: a. the freely given, unmerited favor and love of god. b. the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them. c. a virtue or excellence of divine origin: the Christian graces. d. Also called state of grace. the condition of being in God's favor or one of the elect. 9. moral strength: the grace to perform a duty. 10. a short prayer before or after a meal, in which a blessing is asked and thanks are given. 11. ( usually initial capital letter ) a formal title used in addressing or mentioning a duke, duchess, or archbishop, and formerly also a sovereign (usually prec. by your, his, etc.). 12. Graces, Classical Mythology . the goddesses of beauty, daughters of Zeus and Eurynome, worshiped in Greece as the Charities and in Rome as the Gratiae. 13. Music . grace note. –verb (used with object) 14. to lend or add grace to; adorn: Many fine paintings graced the rooms of the house. 15. to favor or honor: to grace an occasion with one's presence.
